Mama Has a Potty Mouth

I curse. A lot. But I’ve realized several things about this as I’ve gotten older.

  1. It really isn’t very lady like, no matter how you feel about feminism or gender roles, uncouth is uncouth.
  2. It’s an irresponsible choice to swear (especially excessively) once you have children.
  3. It’s even more irresponsible once those children learn to talk.
  4. It doesn’t help you communicate anything more clearly except that you’re crude.
  5. It is very rarely appropriate, let alone truly needed.

So lately I’ve not only been attempting to actually stem the flow of profanity as a whole, but to also substitute profanity for other exclamatory phrases that are much less offensive. For instance, I might say “You scared the ever-lovin’ muffin stuffin’ out of me!” instead of the few choice words I’m sure anyone could come up with in about a heartbeat.

Do you have any substitutions for swear words that you use?


One thought on “Mama Has a Potty Mouth

  1. My son (10 yrs old) got the whole family (husband and 2 other kids) hooked on saying “son of a sasquatch!” which serves 2 purposes: 1) to replace the curse I really want to say, because let’s face it, it’s me cursing, not any of “them” and 2) to make me laugh and forget whatever it was that had irritated me in the first place. If you try it out, make sure you emphasize the “sas” of “sasquatch” and maybe a slightly drawn out 2nd “s” sound in that syllable. 🙂 Enjoy!

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